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Yogee The Amazing Answer Board (1944)

Amazing the stuff I've tossed into the closet over the years and forgot about. Here's one such item: the Yogee Amazing Answer Board. Maybe I should ask it why I keep tossing so much stuff into my closet. Then again, I may not like the answer, so best to leave sleeping ghosts lie. If you go to eBay you'll see this thing go for hundreds of dollars. Not sure why. It is rather cool, though.

The story behind it is even cooler. Some years ago I was on a nostalgia visit to 1000 Acres dude Ranch (a place where city-slickers learn how to fall off a horse). In a previous post I mentioned how I would vacation there in the 1960s summers for weeks on end (or more like stationed, considering we spent over a month there one summer). During my nostalgia visit I hopped in the car one day to go find a bookstore, somewhat close, that I had learned about. I like visiting small bookstores anywhere, any chance I can. This particular bookstore was noted as carrying magic books (I am a former member of the Society of American Magicians and the International Brotherhood of Magicians, so yeah, that was a good hook for me). When I got to the bookstore, it was a long, narrow, rectangle of bookshelves and books. I didn't see any magic-related books, though. As I was leaving, the owner, a pleasant fellow (the type you would want to run a bookstore), asked if I was looking for anything specific. He had noticed the look of disappointment on my face. I was kind of shy at that stage of my life so I was glad he asked. Otherwise, I would have left without realizing the wonderful secret hidden at the back of the bookstore.

He said "oh,yes," he had magic books, and led the way. Toward the back of the bookstore he opened a door. Behind the door was an honest to gosh magic shop. Props, tricks, books, posters, you name it, within the glass counters, on the many shelves, and hanging on the walls was enough magic to dazzle an amateur and professional alike. He said the previous owner opened it, it failed, and, well, there you go. It was a blip in time that got stuck, to my delight for sure. That's where I found Yogee: and, after I tallied it all up, quite a few books on magic, a poster or two, and some tricks. It was weird and special, and one of those wow moments that make living a lot of dull ones, in-between, not a problem. 

So that's how Yogee found its way into my closet. 

 

Yogee the Amazing Answer Board 02
Yogee the Amazing Answer Board 02
Yogee the Amazing Answer Board 02

 

For the Flong of It

What's a flong? Glad you asked. I was wondering that myself for a while. I had them, but didn't know what I had. Collecting pressbooks for movies, an important part of each pressbook was the ad mat section. This is where various sized ads for promoting the movie were shown, with their ordering numbers, for use as newspaper ads. The theater manager would clip out the ads they wanted to run in local newspapers from the pressbook (a really necessary but naughty thing to do if you collect pressbooks like I do!),  then send the clipped ad mats to the regional office handling the movie. What they got back was a flong. Or flongs, if they sent in a few ad mat clippings. In stereotype printing, a flong is a negative mould made in order to cast a metal stereotype from it. The flong could be made from clay or papier-mâché. What the theaters received were the papier-mâché flongs. Here are a few examples below from my collection. The colors varied, but it didn't matter since the flong was only used to create the positive metal plate to print with. If you squint really good, you can make out some of the detail in these negative flongs, but they are, of course, hard to view as is. The positive image in ink was easier to see, once it was printed in the newspaper. 

So there you have it. Now go bring some nostalgia and coolness to your next party by asking "do you know what a flong is for?" 

Stereotype flong 02
Stereotype flong 02
Stereotype flong 02
 

 

Space Patrol Periscope Premium (1950s)

Look what fell out of the closet. Back when you got cool swag through cereal premiums (either in the box or with a cutout from the box to mail in), this Space Patrol Periscope was a nifty gadget (omg–just 25 cents!) for intrepid earth-bound aliens and humans. Space Patrol was a juvenile-oriented science fiction running from 1950 to 1955 on television, but an adult audience soon followed, making it a popular series. While not even at the unexpurgated Star Wars level of special effects, it was still fun to watch the space drama unfold each week for many. Filmed on the original soundstage that Lon Chaney's silent, Phantom of the Opera, was shot, Space Patrol boasted larger setpieces than other science fiction series like Captain Video and Tom Corbett, Space Cadet (as cited in the Wikipedia article, but the citing website link is no longer active). Due to the limitations of broadcasting at the time, episodes were recorded via kinescope for distribution to distant television stations. I have a fond memory of building a similar periscope to spy on the neighborhood kids, but I wish I had had this one at the time. It's way cooler than the one I built.

Space Patrol Periscope Cereal Premium 02
Space Patrol Periscope Cereal Premium 02
Space Patrol Periscope Cereal Premium 02

Halloween 2022 Sighted at Michaels

The most wonderful time of year, Halloween, for those more akin to The Munsters (the originals, not the lame follow ups) or the Addams Family (ditto on the originals) kind of upbringing, has begun. Of course, give it a week or two before Christmas butts in, but enjoy it while you can. Michaels, as usual, is quick to the shelves with merchandise, the stuff that nightmares are made of. Whether you're into goth, dark, light, whimsical, classic, or just plain love it all, those shelves will provide you and your family with ample creepy and kooky fun. Lemax also has yet to disappoint. My favorite is the Mummy Mortuary. So Uber that broom and fly over to a Michaels if you are so inclined. Halloween is happening, baby.

Halloween Michaels 2022 05

Dracula (1931)
Bela Does It Best

BELA_DRACULA

ZC Note: I first posted this in 2007. If you haven't seen Bela as Dracula yet (where the hell have you been?) this review does contain spoilers.

Zombos Says: Classic

It seemed the whole room was filled with mist. Then I saw two red eyes glaring at me, approaching quickly, giving way to a livid face contorted into the gravest mask of terror. It was only Zombos.

"For god's sake, hide me!" he cried.

"Daddos, where are you daddos? You've got a dance question." Zombos Jr was getting closer.

"Playing High School Musical the DVD Board Game, I see," I said, applying more steam to the corpse plants. I had been enjoying the warm, pleasant quiet of the solarium as it filled with mist, attending to my botanical chores. Warm, pleasant, moments never last, do they?

"I don't know why Zimba ever got him that hellish game!" Zombos frantically looked about the room for a hiding place.

"Try behind the bench over there," I pointed. For a man his age, he did move fast when given sufficient reason.

Perhaps I should mention I recommended the game to Zimba. It did make such a wonderful Christmas gift for Zombos Jr; the little fellow simply can't get enough of it.

Zombos Jr came running into the room.

"Did you see my daddos?"

Before I could answer, Zombos sneezed loud enough to wake the dead.

"There you are!" He gleefully ran to Zombos and hustled him out of the room. Zombos let out a moan of despair that followed him all the way up the stairs and down the east hall to the playroom. Wait a minute; I mistakenly told him to hide behind the bench next to the orchids. Silly me, the man’s terribly allergic to them. How could I have forgotten? I turned back to my duties, pondering on another pair of red eyes glaring through dark mist, deep into the dead of night.

The year was 1931. Universal Studios had originally planned a big budget movie, more along the lines of 1923's The Hunchback of Notre Dame and 1925's The Phantom of the Opera, but the Great Depression squelched those plans. Lon Chaney, the Man of a Thousand Faces and master of extreme characterizations, was onboard to star in Dracula, playing both the titular vampire and Van Helsing, the titular vampire's nemesis. Chaney succumbed to a throat hemorrhage before production began, leaving director and creative partner, Tod Browning, disappointed and disheartened.

Other names were bandied about to replace him, including Conrad Veidt, but only one person was born to play the role of the undead count: Bela Lugosi. Say what you will about the shortcomings of Browning's movie, it’s Lugosi's performance as the aristocratic count of corrupting evil that has defined the sartorial look, voice, and mannerisms of Bram Stoker's Dracula ever since. Lugosi was and still is Dracula, down to his hypnotic stare, sensual cape swirl, and suave malice and upper-class pretentions.

Amazingly, Lugosi, who had starred in the smash stage play Dracula, by Hamilton Deane and later John L. Balderston, had to fight fang and nail for the movie role. The expatriate Hungarian actor whose singular, syllabic voice was both a blessing for playing the blood-thirsty count, and a curse for most of his other roles, took less pay then his fellow actors to get the part. Yet, it’s his performance that has provided horrorheads everywhere with undying dreams of immortality, and punsters with a Google's worth of Lugosi-like enunciations.

Lugosi took Dracula seriously, even though Browning may not have.

Cinema historians and fans have written and debated much on the movie's immobilized camerawork, long silent pauses, dialog-weighted pacing after we leave Transylvania, and a stifling confinement to the play's drawing-room set-pieces, with mostly Lugosi's performance making it all worthwhile. In every one of his endeavors, from B-movie to Poverty Row quickie, he never acted down to the material. And while the Spanish version of Dracula, filmed concurrently at night and on the same sets, may be technically superior to Browning's version, the overly melodramatic acting of Carlos Villarias as Conde Dracula is distracting.

Beginning with what would become the signature Gothic-neverworld of Universal; frightened villagers, dreary mist-shrouded landscapes, and expansive interior sets awash with ominous shadows and portents of supernatural danger, poor Renfield (Dwight Frye) doesn't know what he's in for as he heads to Castle Dracula to deliver the lease for Carfax Abbey to its new owner, Count Dracula—on Walpurgis Night, no less. Ignoring the pleas of the villagers not to go, he hops in a coach to make a midnight rendezvous with another that will take him the rest of the way.

The rendezvous with Count Dracula’s coach, pulled by black horses, in the mist-shrouded forest at midnight is foreboding. Renfield barely gets his feet on the ground before the frightened driver who brought him throws his bag down and whips his horses into a gallop to get away. Dracula himself is the driver of the waiting coach. Cinema historian David Skal points out how the scene as written differs from how it was filmed, leading to an anomaly.

In the script, Dracula has his face covered so only his piercing eyes can be seen by Renfield. On film, Dracula's face is not hidden. Renfield can clearly see him, but at the castle he doesn't realize his mysterious host was also his silent coachman. Or perhaps Dracula simply mesmerized him?

Dracula greets him in the cavernous hall of the castle. Renfield sheepishly walks toward the great stone staircase while Dracula slowly descends it, with both framed and dwarfed by the decaying battlements and desolation. The censors wouldn't allow rats to be shown so Browning chose armadillos instead, hoping they’d be creepy enough. They are. He even has a fat vampire bug crawl out of its tiny coffin, which is more odd than creepy. The art direction by Charles D. Hall, combined with Karl Freund’s cinematography generates eeriness and an underlying and indeterminate dread we sense as well as Renfield.

Hall would go on to helm the memorable art direction in Frankenstein and Bride of Frankenstein, while Freund continued casting ominous shadows in his brooding camera work in Murders in the Rue Morgue, and The Mummy.

The howling of wolves prompts Dracula to wax poetic as he implores Renfield to "Listen to them…the children of the night…what music they make." Renfield, not quite sure what to make of all this, haltingly follows the count, who effortlessly passes through a large spider web blocking the stairs.

At this point, I'd be running down the stairs, but Renfield shirks it off and uses his walking stick to open a path through the enormous web. He follows his creepy host to a comfortable room, cheerily lit by a crackling fireplace. Greatly relieved, he even mentions how cheery it is.

It’s as cheery as the movie gets.

Before you can say " I don't drink…wine," Renfield is drugged, tapped out of a pint or two of blood, and turned into a raving lunatic who eats flies and fat juicy spiders for their life's fluid. In an energetic performance that would typecast him, Dwight Frye vividly illuminates the pain, pathos, and sinful pleasure of Dracula's questionable "gift" of immortality. His near feverish ravings contrast sharply with Lugosi's studied, methodical performance, setting the tone for every mad doctor's assistant to come.

Unfortunately, the movie leaves its momentum at the Borgo Pass in Transylvania when Dracula and Renfield sail to London aboard the Vesta. As Skal notes, the shooting script had scenes involving Lugosi baring fangs and attacking the Vesta's crew like some all-you-can-eat seafood smorgasbord. In the movie, the budget and censors took their toll, along with Browning's seeming disinterest, and the Vesta’s voyage is a short run of herky-jerky stock footage from a previous silent movie. Except for one chilling scene in which Renfield laughs and glares maniacally from the ship's cargo hold as he’s discovered when the ship drifts into port, the voyage is not a highpoint it could have been. A movie long in development hell called the Last Voyage of the Demeter aims to capitalize on this shortcoming. (Demeter is the name of the Russian schooner carrying Dracula to England in Bram Stoker’s novel.)

While the ponderously static drawing-room scenes slow momentum,  the tete-a-tete between Dracula and Van Helsing (Edward Van Sloan), and Renfield's more colorfully lucid moments between raving insanity and pitiable remorse, give sufficient animus to the proceedings to hold attention.

This character-driven intensity is lost in the Spanish version. For instance, Carlos Villarias’ Dracula clumsily uses a walking-stick to smash a mirror box that betrays him, diluting the defining confrontation between him and Van Helsing with bug-eyed theatrics. In comparison, Sloan’s Van Helsing quietly tricks Dracula into viewing the box just before he reveals the mirror. Realizing he’s been outwitted, Lugosi’s Dracula smashes the box to the ground with his bare hand while jumping back, his hatred and contempt burning through the short distance between them. Van Helsing calmly strokes his chin as if he’s conducting an experiment. Lugosi's feral glare turns to an apology as he regains composure. He gives Van Helsing a parting compliment to his cunning and a warning, noting how Van Helsing’s not lived even a single lifetime.

Renfield's vexing ability to roam freely around Dr. Seward's house provides humor and energy, enlivening what would otherwise be dialog-heavy situations. Frye alternates Renfield through bouts of ecstasy and damnation as he obediently, and at times unwillingly, helps Dracula get to Mina (Helen Chandler). His description of the thousands of rats with red eyes, shown to him by Dracula as a future reward, would have been an incredible scene if the censors and budget had allowed it.

I've seen Dracula many times over the years, but never noticed the large piece of cardboard placed next to the lamp in Mina's room until more astute viewers wondered at why this mysterious, ragged piece of paper is visible in the scene. Cinema historians and fans differ in their opinions: is it a mistake, having been used to diffuse lighting for a certain camera angle and forgotten? or is it there as part of the script, purposely positioned by Dr. Seward (Herbert Bunston) to keep the harsh lamp light out of Mina’s eyes so she could sleep? Either way, it’s a testament to Lugosi's riveting performance that it usually remains unnoticed in the background.

The current consensus on Tod Browning’s directorial involvement is that he didn't direct much of the movie, but left it to Karl Freund, whose talents as a cinematographer were exceptional, and more adequate than his directorial abilities. I wonder what kind of movie Dracula would have been with Lon Chaney playing the parts of the undead count and his astute, unwavering nemesis Van Helsing. Would Browning have realized a different vision? Would Chaney have used his incredible make-up talents to fashion a more horrific Dracula than Max Shrek's in Nosferatu? If so, would he have been more or less effective than Lugosi's more socially mobile, suave, and seductive vampiric aristocrat?

While no longer scary—given today's desensitized audiences, not much is—Dracula still remains an iconic and important movie in the pantheon of horror cinema due to its initial art direction, and the eternal performances of Bela Lugosi, Dwight Frye, and Edward Van Sloan. As Universal’s first talking horror movie, it set the tone for a new style of terror, creating generations of undying fans to come.

Hybrid: Misfits, Monsters and Other Phenomena
Edited by Donald Armfield
and Maxwell I. Gold

Hybrid BookMy review for Hybrid: Misfits, Monsters and Other Phenomena first appeared in The Horror Zine. It is reposted here with permission.

 

Editors Donald Armfield and Maxwell I. Gold have taken their book, Hybrid: Misfits, Monsters and Other Phenomena, very much to heart in selecting the poems and stories within (a hybrid format in itself), to include bizarro, noir sci fi, sword and sorcery, and speculative fictions for a reading that has something for just about anyone. These tales will either provide you with a straightforward reading or something to puzzle over, leading your thoughts to deeper meanings. Or maybe no meanings at all, just some go-with-it and enjoy moments. A good collection of mixed authors should always make you want to seek out their other works and this book will certainly have you doing that. It should be noted too that the cover design and illustration by Luke Spooner (we often overlook the graphic designers when doing reviews, don’t we?) is quite good.

The first story, Making Friends, is a comedy of errors involving a happy dog, a curious but unhappy creature, and a couple of farmers meeting the neighbors they never knew they had. Angela Yuriko Smith paces it all into a 1950s sitcom-like nocturnal interlude for Miriam and Bill. It is a good choice as the opening story, breezy and light, and visually funny: there be monsters here, but they are not all gloom and doom and gory pieces.

That is, except for what happens to the villagers in the Ruination of the Gods by Dr. Chris McAuley (Stokerverse) and Claudia Christian (Babylon 5 and Wolf’s Empire: Gladiator). A wizard tries to raise the dead but gets caught. As all diligent readers know by now, what happens to people who get on the wrong side of wizards, caught in the act of doing questionable things, means terror to come. Kail, the Conan-like warrior (or Kali, since the proofreader must have been out to lunch with this one), ignores the giant stew-pot death waiting for him for doing the same punishable act and gets into trouble quickly. Luckily for him the monsters from the sea provide a bloody good diversion for the villagers. While this story uses the standard sword and sorcery approach (an angry wizard, a beguiling witch, and a warrior torn between duty and personal need), McAuley and Christian handle the action, the gory pieces, and the tragic fallout of his decision well, leaving the path open for future adventures.

If you lean towards a 3 Stooges-like bizarro storyline, go to Hopital Automatique by D. Harlan Wilson first. It defies description, as any good bizarro fiction should, but if you have watched the 3 Stooges in the comedy short, Men in Black (1934), that provides a bit of a warm-up to the absurd mayhem wrought here. It is an I-don’t-know-what-is-happening narrative and therein lies the fun. The pace is frenetic, the characters and milieu insane, and this opening line will sum it all up for you: “The car didn’t run over the nurse until she had changed my bedpan and injected a second dose. It was a Datsun.” I question how a Datsun got into his hospital room in the first place, but at least it was not an elephant*, and that second dose sounds like a clue. On the plus side, she did manage to change his bedpan before being run down. The only other meagre clue I can give you for this one, without giving up and speaking to Wilson first, is that Hopital is the French word for hospital. For the rest, you are on your own.

More sensible humor will be found in Alicia Hilton’s Savages Anonymous. A funeral home basement in Trenton, New Jersey, provides haven for a nude extraterrestrial with two heads, an extraterrestrial arachnid and other assorted aliens—along with some mutants—griping about the challenges of getting along with humans. A boy’s ghost interrupts their proceedings, sending Xapanna (the two-headed alien) on a vendetta for the boy’s murderers. The Crime Stoppers Tip line sends her in the right direction. The action and humor are conveyed through very short paragraphs, many one to two lines long, and an endearing ending that ties back to the difficulty of getting along with way-out others.

The Scoocoom of Big Rock Mountain is a more serious weird western with a more traditional approach to hybrid terror. Taking place sometime between the 1860s to early 1900s, a former buffalo hunter, Max, now sheriff, has family and Big Foot problems (skookoom is a Chinook word meaning Big Foot). Max, having helped to decimate the Indian tribes by hunting the buffalo to near extinction, is partially responsible for the scoocoom putting the bite on the settlers for its food source. Max also has a drinking problem that makes his aim a bit tricky and his step a lot unsure. Once you get past the proofreader still out to lunch (scoocoom flips to skoocoom a few times), Michael Knost delivers a simply plotted western with all the right emotional and weird elements for his characters and events.

The Big Foot theme is seen again in Maero by Lee Murray, a poem where a day packer is enjoying his hike until he comes across a severed limb and “glossy giblets quivering.” This first-person account with the Maero (Māori for Big Foot) is not the usual “train-train” encounter. A sadder one is to be felt in Kolkata’s Little Girl, in which Bandhura is “waiting, in front of a blue-clothes shop for someone to tell her story.” A too long and heavy mala hangs around her neck, hinting at a deeper meaning hidden among the poem’s lines. Alessandro Manzetti’s acheri is haunting and begs for a longer treatment.

There are many hybrids to be found in this collection of twenty stories and poems. The editors have crafted an engaging reading experience across genre types, of which this review has only scratched the surface. As Dark the Night will trap you in Stella’s depression-fueled shadows; the noir science-fiction Vis-à-Vis puts you there in Punktown among the low-lives and no-lives; and Slo-Mo will make you mind the sloths and give them a wide berth and forget the selfies. All these stories make for an enjoyable and rewarding experience.

*For those not familiar with the Marx Brothers, the reference comes from Groucho’s quip as Captain Spalding: “One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got to my pajamas I don’t know.”  Feel free to also substitute proofreader for elephant if you are so inclined.

The Secret Code (1942) Pressbook

Columbia focused on World War II saboteurs with The Batman and The Secret Code serials. In The Batman, J. Carrol Naish played Dr. Daka, a Japanese mastermind, who, with his henchmen, tangled with the caped crusader. In The Secret Code, the evil Nazi mastermind, Jensen, is played by Trevor Bardette. J. Carrol Naish, again sporting ludicrous makeup, played Charley Chan  in the 1957 television series, The New Adventures of Charlie Chan. During an interview conducted by Ben Mankiewicz, the 93 year old James Hong, who played Chan's Number One Son, mentioned how Naish had him fired from the show because he missed a line. My respect for Naish has dropped quite a bit after that revelation. How absurd too: Naish gets the real Asian actor fired. Wild. 

ComicRack and YACreader version: Download The Secret Code pressbook

The Secret Code pressbook  01

The Secret Code (1942) Herald

Here is the theater herald for The Secret Code (1942) Columbia serial. The Black Commando, a competing action hero to Republic’s Spy Smasher, fights Nazis through fifteen chapters. See The Files of Jerry Blake for a detailed decoding of the serial. Interestingly, especially for a kid into cool stuff, the code tutorials at the end of each chapter were informative. I wonder how many kids sent around coded notes in their classrooms after seeing The Secret Code?

The secret code herald 01
The secret code herald 01
The secret code herald 01

 

Three Strangers (1946) Pressbook

Give me any movie with Sidney Greenstreet and Peter Lorre in it and I'm already sitting with the popcorn or wine or beer or (insert your own beverage or food of choice), and I'm golden. Put a little rain in the sky, a little dark in the streets, and  a cozy couch or chair to go limp in, and I'm more than golden. Of course, add a theater balcony (remember those?) and a big screen, and I'm in heaven, pure and simple. This movie is such an odd little gem, with fate, destiny, and tangled webs of lives between the two, all bottled up by a sweepstakes ticket and a fascination with a small, hopefully wish-granting, statue.  

ComicRack and YacReader version: Download Three Strangers Pressbook

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Three Strangers Pressbook  01

I Shot an Arrow…

John M Cozzoli Childhood

Here's a picture of me (recently fallen out of a photo album) that captures some of the zeitgeist of the 1960s. I'm pretty sure this was taken at 1000 Acres Dude Ranch (though they call it a horse ranch now). I'd be stuck there for much of the summer, anxious to get back to my comic book and monster magazine racks and color television (a Sony Trinitron). I remember one summer I almost missed a critical Fantastic Four issue with the Silver Surfer and Galactus, but, luckily, when I got back home from the ranch, the corner luncheonette, which was awesome for getting my monthly comic and magazine fix, had been closed for vacation too. I didn't miss the issue! It was still on the rack waiting for me.

But the ranch wasn't all that boring for a Brooklyn kid. I learned how to shoot an arrow, row a boat, play pool, tilt a mean pinball, play ping pong and shuffle board, and ride a horse without falling off. Getting on was always a challenge, and one fine day a horse stepped on my foot and refused to move. Man, that hurt like a son of a… All of that was fun (sort of) but my point is more related to those arrows and bow in the photo. I'm pretty young there.  Those arrows were steel tipped. I shot them into fabric targets wrapped around straw, about 10 or more feet away. No fencing, no protections for bystanders or passersby, and I'm, like I said, pretty young there. If that doesn't say much about where we've been and how paranoid and litigious we've become, I can't think of a better illustration. I also remember one summer when I walked into the ranch's management office and up to the counter. I asked for the bow and arrows  and was told they had discontinued it. Some idiot kid had aimed the wrong way and that was that. He ruined it for the rest of us. 

And isn't that always the case? It's always some idiot messing up the good stuff for the rest of us; or complaining about the good stuff and how evil the rest of us are for liking it; or preaching about how bad the good stuff is for the rest of us and we must return to the light. Seems there are a lot more idiots these days than back in the 1960s. I miss the comic and magazine rack. I miss Joe's corner luncheonette. But mostly I miss the good stuff we can't have anymore because of so many idiots now ruining it for the rest of us. 

Perhaps that's why I like horror movies so much. It's pretty much the only genre where the idiots always get their due. Go monsters!

Atom Man vs. Superman Pressbook (1950

Unfortunately, without the boffo effects of today, this serial pales in comparison to today's superhero magnum opuses. But the characters are still endearing and it must have been quite exciting to see your favorite comic book hero on the big screen for those young audiences. More of a budget would have helped a lot, too. I wish I had a lot of those tie-ups for my collection. 

ComicRack and YacReader version: Download Atom Man vs Superman pressbook

Fly over to to see more pressbooks From Zombos' Closet.

Atom Man vs Superman 01

I Have Asked to Be
Where No Storms Come
by Gwendolyn N. Nix
Book Review

G-Nix Storms Come book
My review for I Have Asked to Be Where No Storms Come first appeared in The Horror Zine. It is reposted here with permission.

Sometimes words can get in the way of what an author and editor believe they are placing on the page. So much so that, by the time the novel is finished, you have a highly creative story that is confusing on first reading for anyone but the author and editor. With muddled elements in its framework of figurative joists, and a world-building nomenclature and landscape not putting out enough cogent information to keep the reader’s head above the tale being spun instead of getting mired, it becomes a challenging and bewildering endeavor.

Such is the case with I Have Asked to Be Where No Storms Come, an ambitious novel that melds dark fantasy, alternative history, and weird western fiction, three rich areas for imagination and drama, into a dense reading filled with flashbacks, here and there and now and then scene changes, and dialog heavy chapters alternating the experiences of two special but cursed brothers. All this is made denser by spiritually glossy words combined into metaphysically heavy sentences, replacing direct descriptions with concept-art word-pieces reaching for deep meanings but less clarity. Too much of a good thing is one way to describe this effort.

The head-scratching begins with trying to pin down the “when” of this narrative. A clue is given with how both Domino and Wicasah, two brothers of the Western Plains, from a family of witches, are, briefly, fossil hunters for hire. That would seem to place the time-period around 1877, a boon time for paleontologists in the old west after discoveries that led to dinosaur quarries producing tons of bones. But that does not sit right with other elements in the story that bounce automobiles in with the wagons, and Domino driving a cool muscle car in Hell. Another bone to pick, aside from time, is how Gwendolyn N. Nix pulls from various mythologies and cultures to weave her alternate world and its realms as if she has lots of interests and, sure, why not add it all into this one story. The result is an everything but the kitchen sink aesthetic that is confusing.

It all opens with Domino in Hell, though it is later called Helia, as he sits pondering a cell phone, mystified by it. No foreshadowing here, it is soon dropped. Helia is finally explained later in the novel, although a little too late in Nix’s fluid 5-part plotting structure. In Greek mythology, Helia is a sun goddess. In Nix’s mythology, it is a place. This makes the explanation for it, which is the driving force of the story, important. Instead of being a carefully placed revelation to generate welcomed acknowledgement that the prime reason for everything happening is now revealed, it produces an oh finally instead. Nix continues to provide essential explanations in this way toward the latter part of the novel, for key plot elements introduced at the beginning, as if she were working them out as she wrote. These explanations come through lengthy dialogs well after readers may be wondering about all the esoterica casually tossed their way.

The many elements that Nix draws on give the effect of being add-ons instead of organic elements growing with the story. Instead of a carefully structured unfolding, they appear again and again like a collage of ideas instead of a careful seeding to build the emotional pull with the people inhabiting her bizarre landscape. This landscape is broken in two by the Dark and Bloody, an eco-apocalypse thematic tied to Helia and all the bad reasons Domino and Wicasah, are fighting to survive.

Much exposition is devoted to family turmoil with and between Domino, Wicasah, their witch relatives, and significant others, taking up a large portion of the novel; there is the other turmoil of demons, dead souls, witches’ blood, and witches and god-like beings playing with thunder and worlds. Both eventually coalesce, but the drawn-out nature of the family turmoil dilutes the other. Both are never fully given a history: only those reasons directly related to the plot. Why does Domino and Wicasah’s father hate their mother and all witches? Where did all the witches come from in the first place and why is it a thing? Where did Domino and Wicasah’s tremendous powers come from and why are they so important to others seeking to entrap them?

With all these elements vying for the reader’s understanding, not enough basic wording is given to flesh them out fully or pace them within their importance. It is here where Nix’s stream of spiritual style dulls the pragmatic needs of the underlying actions. Her descriptions are concept-flights that need be re-read, often, to fully grasp what is going on and why.

Lots happens to the people and creatures in Helia and on earth, but their actions and reactions go by like watching a landscape from a moving train. Why Domino and other dead souls wind up in Helia is wonderfully imaginative. Witches and their hungry familiars (Domino’s familiars like to eat bones and do not mind chewing on his now and then); unhappy demons (because of all the annoying dead humans who like to sniff demon bone dust); psychopomps (from Greek mythology, guides for the dead) like the lady-slippers queen and Anxius; nuckelavees (from Orcadian mythology, a man-horse demon); a determined heyoka wielding lightning and a bad disposition (in Sioux culture, a sacred clown)–all swirl together as Domino battles to save his brother from a dangerous father who hates witches, and as Wicasah battles to save his brother from a dangerous battle between witches and gods and demons and dead souls in Helia.

There is a better novel buried in the archeological dig of this one. If you are one for reading word-tripping esoterica and new age spinning fiction, this novel may be well worth your while. There is also enough going on here that a carefully adapted screenplay could capture for Netflix or another streamer for those of us looking for more straightforward storytelling. It would not be surprising at all if that happened.