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Six Other Movies To Watch
On Halloween Night

DeadbirdsSure, you know all the usual horror movies we watch and recommend for Halloween viewing. But what about those other movies? You know, the ones a little harder to come by, not often mentioned, and spoken about in words that end with a self-deprecating laugh.

Well, I will not apologize any more. These movies are creepy fun for a Halloween night, after you have eaten your twelfth candy bar and littered the floor with candy corn as you rummage deep into your trick or treat bag looking for the dark creamy stuff instead.

Make sure to watch them with others, though. It is no fun laughing in the dark, all alone, on Halloween night. You never know who is listening.

Spookies (1987)

If you are looking for the perfect second-half of a double bill Halloween show with Plan 9 From Outer Space, look no further. Spookies is a film to be savored for its underdone acting, overbearing dialog, and incoherent story. So rarely do horror films reach the pinnacle of hilarious “what the f*ck” ineptitude this film achieves so easily.

The Video Dead (1987)

It starts off innocently enough. The Hi-Lite delivery service delivers an unmarked crate to an unsuspecting writer. We know he is a writer because he is sleeping the day away, surly, and says he does not even watch television. He must be a blogger, too. Over his protests they leave the crate in his living room. He manages to pry the crate open and plug in the battered, rotary channel dial, black and white television set. He checks to see if it works, but only one show comes in clearly no matter which channel he turns to. The show is Zombie Blood Nightmare and not much happens in it except for zombies continuously staggering around in the woods.

Shrooms (2006)

Hack and slash, and run run run…to Glen Garig. The one place in the forest they really shouldn’t be going is where they wind up. Before that, everyone is screaming at the top of his or her lungs for everyone else. So my question is this: when being stalked in the forest, can anyone hear you scream? Based on this movie the answer is no. As panic sets in, Tara manages to do a Looney Tunes into a tree, face first. While I think Elmer Fudd had better timing, she’s not bad at it.

Scarecrows (1988)

Escaping in a hijacked plane with the pilot and his daughter, after a robbery worth millions, a para-military bunch is double-crossed by one of their own; a very nervous guy named Burt. He jumps out of the plane with the big–and heavy–box that holds the robbery money, with apparently no plan on how he’s going to carry it once he is on the ground. Being the dumbest of the bunch, he is murdered first; but not before he happens upon the Fowler residence, nestled snuggly amid lots of really creepy-looking scarecrows perched all around the wooden fence encircled with barbed-wire and lots of warnings to stay away. The weird weathervane on the roof, with the pitchfork and pteradactyl, is a clear sign this old homestead is more deadstead than homey.

And for more serious scares…

Uzumaki (2000)

Taken from the three-volume manga by Junji Ito, the town of Kurozu-cho is beset by spirals spinning into the lives of the townspeople, driving them to madness, bizarre change, and gruesome death.

Dead Birds (2004)

A horror story set in the Old West. Bank robbers flee to a lonely house in the woods. But they are not alone. Strange things lurk in the shadows and under the bed, and when they think they are free from danger, it becomes the most dangerous time indeed.

Ghost In the House of Frankenstein
Frankenstein (1931)
Part 1

BORIS KARLOFF
ZC Rating 6 of 7: Classic

Shadows were everywhere. Ominously large shadows mingled with mysteriously short ones. As I tripped and groped my way through them, the dank, dust-laden air irritated my nose and throat. Lightning flickered occasionally, revealing the shadows for what they were–only briefly, gone in an instant–leaving a faint mental snapshot behind, confusing me even more.

“Did you find it yet?” squawked a petulant voice in the darkness.

Startled, I dropped the two-way radio and banged my head on the sloping attic roof as I stooped to pick it up. Rubbing my head, I tapped my foot along the floor, hoping to find Zombos’ blasted new toy. I found it. I pressed the talk button.

“No, I’m still looking,” I whispered.

“What? Why are you whispering?” he asked.

Good question. I cleared my throat. “The dust…I’m still looking. The lights are out and I can’t see a damn thing. Are you sure you left it up here?”

“Yes. Of course I am sure. I definitely remember I put it–what? Oh? But I thought–oh. Never mind then, Zimba found it. You can stop looking.” He clicked off his radio.

Lightning flashed through the dormer window as I stood in the darkness, desperately searching for reasons why I should remain valet to the once renowned B-movie horror actor, now known only by a few remaining–and just as decaying–fans. Thunder rumbled in the distance. I sighed and began the arduous journey back through the clutter of shadows towering and tilting across the west attic’s floor.

Suddenly there came a tapping, then a frantic rapping on the dormer window behind me. At first I thought it was a tree branch blowing in the wind but realized no trees were high enough to reach the mansion’s attic. I went to the window. A lightning sprite lit up a large flittering shape outside. Thunder rumbled, shaking the window’s broken latch open. A spray of water blew into my face as a flopping ball of wetness and blackness rolled onto the floor. Startled, I tripped over something in my surprise and fell backwards. The ball unfurled into wings. It was the largest bat I had ever seen.

“Damn, it’s a night only Frankenstein could love,” said the bat, shaking his wet wings. “Hello, might you hand me that please?”

I stood there. My lower lip hung an inch lower than my upper one. I reached into my pocket to see if I had left the two-way radio on. Nope. I then felt my head to see if I was bleeding or had a bump suitable for hallucination. Nope. I still stood there.

“I say, if you would, I’d appreciate it greatly.” The bat pointed the tip of his right wing at my left foot. I looked down and saw a small Al Capone slim cigar sticking out from under it. I lifted my foot and used the tip of my shoe to roll it to him.

“Ah, many thanks,” he said. He folded his wings together and used their tips to pick up the cigar. “You don’t happen to have a light?”

I checked the two-way radio and felt my head again. Still nope.

“I’m Wally,” he said.

“Wally…the bat,” I mouthed the words without a sound. I stood there looking at him. He looked up at me. We looked at each other for about a half-minute. “We don’t allow smoking in the mansion,” I finally said.

“Yes, well, it’s soggy and flat anyway.” He dropped the cigar and flicked his wings, sending droplets of water across my patent leathers. “Sorry about that. I must say, this is the most cluttered attic I’ve ever been in.”

We looked at each other for another half-minute or so.

“Is that an English accent?” I asked. Bat hallucinations speaking with English accents always fascinate me.

“I hadn’t noticed myself. Must have come from my hanging out at Oxford.” He flicked his wings again. “Sorry. Force of habit.” He puckered his lips as if he were whistling. We continued to look at each other in silence.

My mind began to wander. I, understandably, at a loss for words, and Wally the bat looking, forlornly it seemed, at his wet flat cigar. An odd night indeed and one more suited to mad scientists. My thoughts meandered around English accents, lightning storms, undead monsters, their reluctant brides, and other times…

 

…While our dull yellow eyes may no longer be shocked or horrified by James Whale’s Frankenstein, we are still thrilled by it. Perhaps it is the gothic-expressionism in its scenes alternating between light and dark, or perhaps it is the funereal sounds, the crackling electrical arcs from infernal machines, and the thundering, stormy nights that keep us coming back for more. Then again, it could be the story’s scintillating pace, filled with luridly atmospheric, yet poetic, macabre images, and vivid–now archetypal–characters revealed through Wale’s inquisitively roaming camera. Whatever the reasons may be, one thing is certain: Frankenstein solidified Universal Studios’ unique brand of talking-onscreen horror, which began with Dracula, and threw open theater doors everywhere to let in more monsters, madmen, and mayhem than you could shake a flaming torch at.

Mischief and madness are afoot in the sleepy town of Goldstadt, somewhere in Europe. Or is it Europe? Both locale and time period are unclear. English accents mix with American ones, and architectural styles mingle haphazardly. But one thing is certain, or should we say two? During a late-night funeral service, two odd-looking men wait behind a wrought iron fence, just out of sight. Like little school boys ready to play a nasty prank, they can barely contain their impatience until the last clump of earth is tossed with a heavy thud onto the coffin-lid. As the gravedigger leaves, they rush to the newly turned earth to retrieve the fresh corpse. Under the stony gaze from the Grim Reaper statue wildly tilting behind them, Henry Frankenstein (Colin Clive) and Fritz (Dwight Frye), his hunch-backed, unkempt assistant, gleefully cart their prize away.

But their night’s work is not yet done. Coming across a gibbet at the crossroads, Fritz reluctantly climbs the shaking hangman’s post and cuts the body loose. Henry is disappointed. The neck is broken of course, thus ruining any chance for a useful brain. He sends Fritz off to snatch one from the local Goldstadt medical school.

Dwight Frye played Renfield in Dracula so well he became typecast in the role of the manic, misfit, mad scientist’s–or evil vampire’s–assistant. His kinetic Fritz in Frankenstein sealed his fate, but it remains the performance of a lifetime. With his stubby cane, woefully too short to do much good, his crippling hunchback and skittering walk, and his tremulous speech, he is pitiable and contemptible at the same time; a character whose look and mannerisms will become copied and parodied in countless spookshows and movies.

At the medical school, clumsy Fritz drops a perfectly good brain when he frightens himself. The only other brain conveniently pickled close by is the one from a psychotic killer, conveniently labeled “ABNORMAL”. Oh, well, what’s an illiterate hunch-backed, demented assistant to do?

As Henry toils away the midnight hours blaspheming against God with his body-parts suturing, his fiancee Elizabeth (Mae Clarke) is worried. In one of Whale’s signature close-up compositions, he introduces her and Victor (John Boles), Henry’s rival for her affections, filling ordinarily static dialog with movement and tension, keeping the pace trotting inside and outside the laboratory. Elizabeth insists she and Victor see Dr. Waldman (Edward Van Sloan), Henry’s former professor, to find out why Henry is acting strangely.

In their meeting with Dr. Waldman, the more properly starched doctor tells them about Henry’s unhealthy, heretical habits, like trying to create life out of dead bodies. Dr. Waldman is Henry’s moral and societal conscience, the polar opposite of Henry’s other teacher, the amoral–but fun-loving–Dr. Pretorius in Bride of Frankenstein. Like Dwight Frye, Edward Van Sloan also became typecast. He became the perfectly knowledgeable, morally upright, and strong-willed man of reason and science for any occasion, no matter what his other acting credits said.

There’s a wonderfully quirky embellishment made by Frye as the trio of Waldman, Elizabeth and Victor knock on the front door to the old watchtower, Henry’s laboratory, at night as rain pours down. Both Fritz and Henry are busy preparing for the storm’s full electrical fury and they can’t be bothered with visitors at such a critical time. Hobbling down the long, steep flight of stairs framed by the tower’s walls, sloping in odd, off-plumb angles high up into shadows, Fritz hurries to the door, dismisses them brusquely, then hurries back up the steps, pausing ever so briefly in his frenzy to pull up a drooping sock while juggling a lantern and his useless cane: a brilliant, toss-away move that belies the childlike in Fritz, caught between his gnarled adult body and ambiguous soul.

Eventually Henry realizes who’s at the front door and comes down to let them in. In another signature use of his dynamic lens, Whale follows Henry, passing the camera’s view across–and seemingly through–the wall separating the lab from the stairway in one fluid motion. Henry invites them in to view the creation of the Monster; and what a creation it is! Kenneth Strickfaden’s awesome electrical apparatus sparks and arcs and crackles with brilliance as the body, stitched together from dead tissue, is raised to the heavens during the height of the storm. In a crescendo of lightning flashes, electrical discharges, crashing thunder, and anxious faces, the body is brought back down. Slowly, the lifeless hand is lifeless no more, and Henry utters the formerly censored words, “Now I know what it feels like to be God!”  Frankenstein’s Monster coming to life proves Henry’s scientific skills, but what follows his triumph really needed more of his parental ones, which he was sorely lacking.

Is the Monster really evil or is he just misunderstood? Henry and Waldman argue this point, and whether to keep the Monster (Boris Karloff) alive. Everything quickly goes wrong when the Monster makes his first onscreen appearance. First you hear clumping footsteps ascending the stairs, then the door slowly opens as he enters, facing backwards. Slowly he turns around, and two zooming close-ups reveal Jack Pierce’s creepy cotton and collodion makeup that surely must have made hearts skip a beat in 1931. Directing the Monster to sit, Henry opens the skylight to let in sunlight. The Monster reaches upward, attracted by the sudden brightness, trying to touch it. When Henry closes the skylight, the mute Monster again expresses want with his hands. Karloff’s pantomime performance is poignant. Perhaps Waldman is wrong and–damn, what’s Fritz doing with that torch?

As the composure of the Monster turns from fear to frustrated rage, so does Henry’s reason begin to shatter and Waldman presses his argument to destroy the blasphemous creature. Like all mad scientists, Henry was only interested in the experiment, not its consequences. Fritz should not have mistreated the poor thing, though. Fire, whips, chains, such abuse is bound to make any monster inordinately angry (and more monstrous).  A long scream of terror later, Fritz is found hanging by his own overly used whip. Making matters worse, Waldman becomes choked up over his work–the Monster throttles him to death–before he can disassemble Henry’s patchwork creation. Henry meanwhile has succumbed to exhaustion, disappointment, and doubt.

The Monster strolls out the front door and goes wandering the countryside looking for understanding, but finds none. Each peaceful moment is ruined by skittish villagers, or his blundering and uncontrollable anger. In one scene previously lost to the censors, but eventually restored, his happy moment of play with little Maria (Marilyn Harris) is cut short when he runs out of flowers to toss on the water’s surface. He innocently tosses her in to see if she will float like the flowers, but not being a water lily, she doesn’t. This, naturally, upsets the villagers.

With Henry back on his feet and ready to marry Elizabeth, their wedding day is marred by little Maria’s death and the Monster’s sudden attack on Elizabeth. Beginning with Maria’s father’s solemn walk through the singing and dancing villagers, carrying her small limp body, followed by the hasty assemblage of torch-wielding mobs to hunt down the Monster, leading to Henry’s confrontation with his now loathed creation, the movie moves to its incendiary climax at the old windmill. Henry and Monster have a dad and son reunion that leaves both apparently dead and theater audiences clamoring for more.

Never say die when boffo box-office receipts are involved.

Meet the Horror Bloggers:
The Drunken Severed Head

Drunken Severed Head Many fans of horror, amateur and professional alike, have devoted themselves to
blogging about the thrills, chills, and no-frills side of the genre as seen in cinema and print. In this ongoing series that highlights the writers behind the blogs, we meet the unique personalities and talents that make the online horror scene so engaging. Up close and personal.

In this installment, Max Cheney of the Drunken Severed Head proves he’s more than just a pretty face when it comes to horror.

I am a Siamese, or conjoined twin. My other half, separate–and certainly unequal–but seamlessly connected to my self via an e-thereal broad band, is a drunken severed head named Max. We share that first name–I am Max Cheney, Jr., and I love the weird and macabre.

My love for horror started when in 1964, when I was three. I was given the 5-inch high monster figures “Pop Top Horrors” to play with. Cast in Halloween-orange plastic, they were different from other solid figures, as they had detachable heads that could be popped on and off. I had great fun switching the heads! Making an impression on me that same year was being taken to see The Evil of Frankenstein
which featured a toy-like makeup design for its Frankenstein Monster. I learned from watching that film that being scared could be fun. Being born (prematurely) into a blended family, with parents whose marriage was always filled with problems, I was always an anxious kid. Finding a form of anxiety that was thrilling was a revelation!

The following year, I was watching the programs “Milton the Monster” and “The Munsters,” both featuring Frankensteinian monsters, and I adored both shows. As a present for my birthday in 1965, I was given a Herman Munster talking puppet. That set me for life as a fan of monsters, but of the classic Universal Frankenstein’s Monster especially.

Interview: Classic Hollywood Horror-Comedies
With Paul Castiglia

BorisBoogie Paul Castiglia has been writing and editing comic books and pop-culture articles for 20 years, most notably overseeing the Archie Americana paperback series of classic Archie Comics reprints. His past forays into horror-comedy include providing a chapter for the book MIDNIGHT MARQUEE ACTOR SERIES: VINCENT PRICE covering Price’s comedic horror films with Peter Lorre, and writing the comic book based on the animated series Archie's Weird Mysteries. He has also edited the upcoming Archie Comics Haunted House trade paperback collection of spooky stories.

Paul's blog, Scared Silly, will post its first review at midnight tonight, kicking-off his adventure writing about classic horror comedies for his upcoming book, Scared Silly: Classic Hollywood Horror-Comedies.

Here's my interview with Paul to wet your appetite.

 

How does a writer and editor for Archie comics wind up doing a book on classic horror-comedies?

Simple, I’ve always been a fan of the horror-comedy genre, and I’ve always wanted to read a book that provided an overview of the entire genre. Since none existed, I figured the only way I’d be able to own a book like that would be to write it myself!

It really goes back to my childhood. I was a child in the 1970s, when movies and TV shows from past decades were routinely rerun. I grew up watching the classic comedians on TV, particularly Laurel & Hardy and Abbott & Costello; and I grew up watching a lot of cartoons. Both of those pastimes fed into my love of comic books.

Originally I was scared of films like “Abbott & Costello Meet Frankenstein” (heck, when I was real little I was also scared of Herman Munster!), but ultimately the comic relief alleviated the scares and somewhere along the line I developed a particular fondness for the “spooky” comedies.

This fondness served me well when it came time to write the “Archie’s Weird Mysteries” comic book series (based on the TV cartoon of the same name) and a chapter in a book about Vincent Price films covering the horror-comedies where he was teamed with Peter Lorre.

Ghost chasers Horror and comedy seem to be opposites; so why do you think horror-comedies have always enticed audiences?

Psychologists will tell you that the difference between a laugh and a scream is slight. In fact, sometimes people laugh when they should be screaming. “Nervous laughter,” they call it. Both are a form of release, and when combined they make a formidable pair: what better way to relieve the tension of just being scared than with a laugh right on top of the scare?

In the end, it goes back to the basis of all stories – the idea that being a hero means conquering a problem. If you can laugh at your fears, you are that much closer to conquering them.

Trick or Treat (1986)
Wicked Rock and Roll

Trick or treat

Zombos Says: Good

Metalheads, demonic forces, wicked rock and roll, an intimidated outcast teen, and the 1980s seem to go together in horror movies like Honey Nut Cheerios and fat-rich milk. I don’t know if Eddie Weinbauer (Marc Price) likes Cheerios, but he does
like heavy metal rocker Sammi Curr (Tony Fields). Idolizes him in fact. Sammi does things Eddie dreams of doing if he had the chance. When Sammi goes and dies in a hotel fire, Eddie, disheartened, heads off to school to face his typical day of being emotionally bullied by the in-crowd; the pretty faces, lithe bodies, why-do-you-listen-to-that-crap and why-can’t-you-be-like-one-of-us crowd. His day is made worse when jock Tim (Doug Savant) precipitates Eddie’s sudden appearance, without his very important shower towel, in the girl’s gym class. Luckily for Eddie this is the pre-YouTube, Facebook age, so it was just a Polaroid of his butt making the hallway rounds later.

Sammi, before he became famous, was bullied and intimidated for being different, too. He even graduated from the school Eddie goes to. Both have a lot in common, but it’s Sammi’s death that brings them face to face. But at a price of course; this is a horror movie after all.

Eddie’s deejay buddy Nuke (Gene Simmons) perks up his down day with the master recording of Sammi’s last, unreleased, album. Nuke already has it on tape and is going to play it at midnight. Later, when Eddie falls asleep listening to it, he dreams about Sammi’s death. He wakes up to the record repeating some odd words and, on a hunch, tries the old trick of playing the record backwards (now it is an old trick; back then it was fairly new). Eddie realizes Sammi is speaking to him; really, not philosophically. There is no psychological subtlety here, no maybe it is just Eddie going off the deep
end
. Trick or Treat keeps its Black Sabbath evil straight as any self-respecting 1980s heavy-metalized horror movie should.

Sammi is anxious to get even for all the bullying he had to deal with in school. Eddie wants revenge for all his mistreatment. It’s a match made in Hell and both hook up for some payback; only Sammi plays a lot rougher than Eddie and for cemetery-keeps. When Eddie balks after almost killing Tim in shop class, Sammi pays him a fire and brimstone visit, powered by the amperage in Eddie’s stereo.

Ozzy Osbourne puts in a brief appearance as televangelist Reverend Aaron Gilstrom, a crusader against the bad influences of heavy metal music. Brief because, as he appears on Eddie’s television set during Sammi’s sudden visit from the grave, Sammi reaches into the screen and pulls him out by his Holy Roller neck in a 1980s special effects kind of way.

Not only does Sammi look heavy metal rock and roller musician bad, he is bad.

Eddie realizes he may have misjudged his idol a bit, and with the Halloween school dance about to start, needs to act fast to stop Sammi from exacting his revenge. Powering the dead rocker is his music played from a cassette tape (how many of you remember cassette tapes?).

A seductive scene in Tim’s car involving his girlfriend and Sammi’s hot music allows for 1980s puppet-demon and melted ears special effects. Eddie deals with the evil cassette, but Nuke has his reel to reel tape set to go at midnight, and Sammi has set up a mystical force field around the machine at the radio station.

Bummer.

As I recall, there were times I wanted to do to my tapes what Eddie does to Sammi’s cassette—and do not get me started on those really evil 8
Track cartridges.

Eddie gives the task of destroying the cassette to his only friend, Roger (Glen Morgan). Sammi pays Roger a visit and, well, you know where this one is going. The cassette winds up at the school dance, allowing Sammi to appear for a song accompanied by lethal pyrotechnics. Eddie’s sort-of girlfriend, Leslie (Lisa Orgolini), helps him fight Sammi. Both split up; Leslie tries to destroy the reel to reel tape player before midnight and Eddie goes for a hectic drive with Sammi.

Although the scariest things in Trick or Treat are the 1980s hairdos and being reminded of those nasty cassette tapes, Sammi is a cool rock and roll villain, the story is low-key horror fun, and the music is heavy-metally sharp. Eddie’s character is one many of us can relate to and his idolization of Sammi mimics our own glorification of our rock and roll gods.

And playing records backwards is really cool to do, especially on Halloween, too.

Meet the Horror Bloggers: No Room In Hell

matt hirsch

Many fans of horror, amateur and professional alike, have devoted themselves to
blogging about the thrills, chills, and no-frills side of the genre as seen in
cinema and print. In this ongoing series that highlights the writers behind the
blogs, we meet the unique personalities and talents that make the online horror
scene so engaging. Up close and personal.

In this installment, Matt Hersh of No Room In Hell reveals the deep dark truth of good horror: it’s all about the high from fear.

 

I lay in my dark bedroom, paralyzed with fear and certain that Jason Voorhees was going to climb up the stairs at any moment and throw me out the window to my death. I was 10 – old enough to rationalize that this couldn’t really happen but young enough to still hold on to my childhood fears. Maybe I shouldn’t have watched Friday the 13th: Part V that day.  But that was pretty typical for me back then. I was both fascinated with and terrified by horror films for as long as I could remember. I played a game of limbo with them, avoiding them like the plague for fear of nightmares but also sneaking a peak with morbid curiosity whenever one was on television.

Halloween Pumpkin Carving Tricks and Tips

Monsters When it comes to pumpkin carving, Pumpkin Masters Pattern Books are the black cat's meow. My favorite one, hands down, is the Universal Studios Monsters Carving Pattern Book put out in 2003.

Patterns for Dracula, Frankenstein Monster, Bride of Frankenstein, Wolf Man, Mummy, and Creature From the Black Lagoon, make for quite the monstrous jack o' monsters patch indeed. Sadly, the book is long out of print and nearly impossible to scare up a copy.

So here are three patterns from the book to wet your pumpkin king carving soul.

Just Download Pumpkin_Masters_Monsters (Frankie, Gill Man, and Wolfie) and print out the patterns. This is a PDF document around 7MB.

 

Movie Review: Idle Hands (1999)

Idle handsMick: Wait a minute. If you chop off your right hand, how are you going to chop the other one off?
Anton: Oh no, man, the lefty’s a keeper. I mean, I guess it wasn’t idle enough.
Mick: Really?
Anton: Oh yeah, I mean, I hit the remote with it, light up with it, relieve a little tension. No, this is the answer.

Zombos Says: Very Good

Five dexterous digits with a penchant for murderous mayhem provide the Halloween scare-comedy hijinks in Idle Hands. Piling on cliches and nuances from movies like The Hand, Beetle Juice, Scream, and most teen-slacker-slasher romps, Anton has his hands (hand?) full trying to keep from killing everybody in arm’s length. He is the kind of kid who lives in the attic, spends all day lounging around and smoking pot, and does not worry when his parents go missing until after a few days go by; he is the perfect plaything for an ancient demon who takes the old adage–idle hands are the devil’s playthings–seriously, and enjoys possessing those in need of a helping hand: murderously helpful, yes, but still very motivating for Anton (Devon Sawa).

Idle hands Anton’s two friends, Mick (Seth Green) and Pnub (Elden Henson) are not very helpful when Anton discovers his dead parents. Mick and Pnub are distracted by a booty-bounce music video as he frantically points to the two bodies lying in front of the television. When they finally do notice, they are a bit slow in putting the pieces together when clues point to Anton as the murderer.

His hand takes over before they can tell anybody about it. Anton tries to bury the mess in the backyard, but his dead friends, deciding the distance to the “white light” was too far, and finding the celestial music “kinda uncool, like Enya,” not very enticing, decide to come back as his undead friends. They would easily fit into the Beetle Juice waiting room: Mick has a broken bottle stuck deep into his cranium, and Pnub’s head is hanging free and easy–but not in that really good way; and both are very zombie-gray and disheveled. They do not hold a grudge after being murdered–finding undeadness kind of cool–and lend a helping hand.

Anton decides his offending right hand must go and finds the biggest meat clever in the drawer after the bagel slicer fails to do the job. Gory sight gags splatter the humor as the now liberated hand takes a fancy to Anton’s new girlfriend Molly (Jessica Alba). While Mick and Pnub go for the antiseptic and ouch-less band-aids, Anton tosses the nasty fist into the microwave for broiling–remember the kitchen scene in Gremlins?–but Mick and Pnub, in dire need to heat up their burritos, let it loose again. Unperturbed, they sit down to enjoy their burritos. Mick improvises with duct tape when Pnub’s burrito oozes out of his severed neck.

While Anton and his undead, but cool, friends cope, a Druid priestess (Vivica Fox) from a long line of Druid priestesses, is racing to Anton’s town in her vintage Airstream touring coach to kick-ass the evil. When she arrives she, of course, heads to the bowling alley. Druid priestesses must stay in shape by bowling. While there she meets Randy (Jack Noseworthy), Anton’s friend. Randy’s name fits him like a glove. He immediately believes her story about the ancient demon possessing idle hands and tells her about Anton.

Everyone–and hand–meet up at the Halloween school dance for the showdown. The hand, after sharpening its fingers in a pencil-sharpener, is ready to take them all on as it gropes toward taking Molly to hell at midnight; that’s midnight Druid time so there’s not much time to spare. The desperate battle to save Molly, and stop the hand’s plan, moves from shop class, where hand puppets are a natural for malicious use by the hand, to automotive class, where Molly is bound to the hood of a car on a hoist that is edging closer to the ceiling by the second. In the midst of fighting for the hoist’s controls, the boys notice “Mighty Joe Bong,” a wickedly welded, muffler-styled cannabis smoker–the students in shop class learned their skills very well it appears–and light up for a toke to bolster their strength. In-between, the often used cliches of a people-fitting air vent escape and big whizzing fan-blades blocking the only way out provide the light-hearted suspense.

Christopher Hart lends his handy talents as the nasty demon-possessed hand. He is a natural; he played Thing in the Addams Family films. Talk about typecasting.

Meet the Horror Bloggers: Dimension Fantastica

James wallestein Many fans of horror, amateur and professional alike, have devoted themselves to blogging about the thrills, chills, and no-frills side of the genre as seen in cinema and print. In this ongoing series that highlights the writers behind the blogs, we meet the unique personalities and talents that make the online horror scene so engaging. Up close and personal.

In this installment, James Wallestein of the Spanish-language horror blog Dimension Fantastica tells us about his passion for a genre that knows no borders.

 

Hello, my name is James Wallestein and I live in Dallas, Texas. I write a horror cinema blog in Spanish. Maybe this sounds odd, but I always thought that someone needs to write in Spanish about fantastic cinema for a country with 40 million Spanish speakers!

Personally, I believe it a matter of my DNA to love horror and fantastic cinema. My dad taught me to read at four years old, and he is a fanatic for fantastic cinema and the comics. I grew up reading hundreds of comics (filling all the corners of our apartment) that my dad bought: The Fantastic Four; Conan; X-men; Flash Gordon; Superman; Batman; Spiderman, and more…I remember the great art of Jack Kirby with fascination.

At five years old my dad took me to see Jaws and it was a shock. I was terrified with this damn white shark. Later, in 1977, my dad took me to see Star Wars and Orca, the Killer Whale (pretty impressing for me was the scene of the abort with the baby whale). My dad has a big love for fantasy in his DNA, and therefore he transferred to me his passion into my genetic code.

Graphic Book Review: High Moon Vol. 1

High Moon

Zombos Says: Very Good

Werewolves and hoodoo in the Old West; two notches on the gunbelts worn by both the bad and the good guys. I found that an intriguing premise for David Gallaher and Steve Ellis's High Moon, a webcomic series appearing on Zuda.com, and now in print by DC Comics. The story moves briskly through the small towns of Blest–which is not–and Ragged Rock–which most certainly is–as former Pinkerton detective Matthew Macgregor is chasing after werewolves and other night-born beasties. Macgregor is a brooding, mysterious figure who wears a tartan scarf in spite of the heat, is short on words and temperament, and carries enough supernatural baggage to fill a railway car all by himself.

Three chapters, beginning with the 100 days drought-plagued town of Blest, keep the Macgregors busy. Yes, there are more than one. I cannot explain too much on this point, but Gallaher and Ellis start with one Macgregor on a mission, or vendetta, or perhaps a soul-ride to salvation, and bring the rest of the clan in as the plot unfolds its deeper pleats. It is not made clear exactly what drives him, but flashbacks give us little clues along the way.

Ellis's gritty art is tightly packed with heavy pencil and ink lines that can become murky at times when saturated with the dry earth and desert sand daylight colors in the first two chapters, and deep blue nighttime snowy landscapes in chapter three. But his style reminds me so much of a sheriff's sooty wanted poster and the animated opening credits to the television show The Wild, Wild West, and even those illustrations in  penny-dreadfuls, or as Deputy Jeb calls them, dime novels, that his gaudy style is in step with the Old West theme.

High moon There is a starting the story in the middle of it approach used by Gallaher. Macgregor enters the small town of Blest looking for an outlaw he has tangled with before. A little girl is missing, and vicious attacks on the townsfolk at night have set everyone on edge. But there is something else driving Macgregor; a bigger mission beyond his hunt for the outlaw. After a preliminary search of the missing girl's room, he knows it was not men or werewolves who took her. More clues found in an abandoned silver mine, and more flashbacks regarding the San Saba Expedition, hint at a great evil unleashed. The inevitable showdown between Macgregor and that evil reveals a darker truth lurking in Blest.

In chapter two, a train robbery, a traveling sideshow with one deadly oddity, and another well-mannered, stove-pipe hatted, steampunk-outfitted Macgregor add more mystery to the saga of Ragged Rock, another town suffering under its burden of nocturnal miscreant monsters.  Macgregor's past comes back to haunt him, and there are tantalizing glimmers of hoodoo in his background. Gallaher and Ellis keep it moving toward the big-nasty showdown, in-between two brothers fighting over the same woman, an eye-plucking revelation of cosmic proportions for one Macgregor, and a gift of immortality that may just be a curse in disguise. Old-time references–like the Harvey Girls (waitresses in the Old West)–and slang–catawampus (things gone awry)–give the characters a tidy period finish. At this point, you either pay close attention to the flashbacks and hints of backstory tossed your way, or you will become lost in the shuffle because Gallaher and Ellis keep piling it on as they move into chapter three and more trouble in Elk Canyon in South Dakota.

Here, in the snow-bound opening scenes of an Indian massacre, pictures convey the action without words. It is a dramatically-charged sequence, but words would have helped clarify the situation. Or maybe Gallaher does not want clarity just yet? As it stands, the marauders, dressed in horns, black clothes, and blood–the leader looks like Conan the Conqueror's Thulsa Doom leading his pillagers–are searching for something. Before you can bat an eye, the story moves on, leaving more mystery to ponder. Young Raven is in search of a champion and seeks Macgregor to combat the cavalry that is killing her people. But there is more behind the cavalry's actions than genocide, and Young Raven is more than she appears to be. An odd symbol, found on the bottom of a bottle, turns up providing another piece to the puzzle of Macgregor's higher mission, and his encounter with a bird-faced, godlike being leaves him questioning his purpose; along with a bit of cosmic enmity that probably will not do him much good in the long run.

I am not sure where Gallaher and Ellis are leading with all this but more developments to the story (you can read them online at zuda.com), which include a meeting with a certain Saucy Jack and Dr. Bell (Sherlock Holmes' fans pay attention), keep invigorating this steampunkish Western or British or Scottish story of bug-eyed beasties and chaps: the ones you wear and the British kind. The artwork melds with the story more than well, and if printed in a larger format, I would even hazard a smashingly to describe the balance between art and word. While you can read the story online, I recommend picking up the book. I was going to–honest–before DC Comics offered me a review copy. The paper choice for the book is that rough, dull-finished paper, which fits the overall tone of High Moon to a tee.

It is heartening to see a storyline about unglamerous werewolves at a time when Goth-beautiful vampires and endless zombies seem to rule the horror genre roost in comics and movies.

Book Stores Need to Go Digital Now

Wherethewildthingsare I was in my local Borders this past week to browse the horror book shelves. I like browsing books before I buy them. Magazines, too. I also like the coffee at Borders; I sip it while I browse. I made a bad choice of getting something too creamy this time, though, and paid for it. I hate being lactose-intolerant.

Another thing I hate is seeing the dwindling shelf-space given to horror titles. And those books given space are fairly mainstream, of course, to appeal to as broad a book-buying market as possible. Author names are really important here as they help sell the books, so I see many of the same authors who have earned that broad appeal in Borders and Barnes and Noble. At least Borders still has a horror section. Barnes and Noble, the one I frequent anyway, (I like Starbucks coffee, too), pretends horror does not exist. They sprinkle horror titles into other categories. I'm always embarrassed to ask about specific horror books when I go to Barnes and Noble. If I dare correct the stock-person when they tell me a book I am looking for is not horror he or she tends to get snooty and gives me a look Jason and Freddy could learn a lot from. I explain I know a thing or two about horror because I blog about it and, well, that usually ends the conversation faster. So I try not to mention it anymore.

Polka Haunt Us
And Maybe You Too

Polkahauntus Okay, maybe it is just me, but every time I listen to a Polka Haunt Us song I am reminded of the Song of the New Wine scene in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man. Anyway, after listening to their pawky tunes (my favorite is Blank Face Goblins), I think you may find a surprise or two here, too. I always thought accordion music was creepy, but now its creepy in a good way.

“Check out the new video for Veronique’s song “Vampire Surprise,” off her eclectic, unique, laboriously produced Halloween album Polka Haunt Us: A Spook-tacular Compilation. Who says horror has to be so scary? Veronique is working (in her own weird way, of course) to give the Monster Mash a run for its money and bring new life into Halloween music as a genre! And her costume is pretty fabulous too!”

See the video for Vampire Surprise here: http://www.youtube.com/veroniquechevalier.