Courtesy of It Came From Hollywood, and through the peregrinations of one Granny Creech, come these hot radio spots for movies from a time when women were eye-candy and men were drooling idiots oggling and dreaming about them as they appeared in various states of distress and undress on the silver screen (story, what story?) We’ve come a long way, baby, as Loretta Lynn sang in her song (which was based on an advertising slogan to entice women to smoke Virginia Slims and get cancer like the men: equal rights for all!) Now you can enjoy these racy radio spots in the privacy of your own computer space. Lucky you.
And now a word from Granny…
I was cleaning up the kitchen the other day after an all-nighter of cooking up some of my famous brew when I heard an awful noise coming from the front of my house. It sounded like something was being dragged, creating a loud screeching sound. I hurried to the front door and opened it, and my eyes fell upon a creepy sight. Coming up my sidewalk were two ghastly figures, both wearing worn black suits with top hats, and dragging what appeared to be a large coffin-shaped wooden box. I approached them and asked what in the world they were doing.
“Are you Granny Creech?” the one on the left asked in a creaky old voice.
“I am. What are you two doing here?”
“My name is Paul McShroud. This is my business associate Robert O’Graves. We have something for you.”
I went and looked at the large wooden box, the top fastened to the bottom with a large rusty lock.
“What is this? What’s in it?”, I asked.
“This is a collection of a lifetime,” Mr. O’Graves said. “We need to pass all of this along and we knew it would be safe and cared for in your hands.” he added. (ZC Note: I found out later the stuff was HOT! They had to ditch it fast and Granny is such a pushover.)
Mr. McShroud reached in his pocket and pulled out an old key. He unlocked the rusty old lock and together he and Mr. O’Graves opened it. I peered in and couldn’t believe my eyes. It was full of musty old radio spots and all sorts of promotional audio material. I stood there with my mouth wide open and glanced at the two cadaverous persons in front of me.
“Do you know what you have here?” I asked. “This is a priceless treasure-trove of old marketing materials. Are you sure you want to get rid of it?”
“No one in our families wants it,” Mr. McShroud said with a sadness in his voice. “We are getting old and what time is left is needed to do other things. We want you to have these to preserve them for posterity.” (ZC Note: Let that be a lesson to all you collectors out there! You can’t take it with you. Just give it to me, Granny, and It Came From Hollywood. In that order, of course.)
I stood there flabbergasted. I eventually composed myself long enough to say, ”Let’s take this into the house.”
Together the three of us dragged the old box into my parlor. I offered them some brew, which they readily accepted. We sat in the kitchen and talked for about an hour, each telling the story of our collecting history. Both Mr. McShroud and Mr. O’Graves, of It Came From Hollywood, fell in love with movie material, especially promotional material, and had been collecting for most of their lives. Now it was time to pass their treasures on to the next generation.
I assured them that “Granny Creech’s Radio Spot Crypt” would be a good home for their collection and would be treated with the utmost care and respect. I told them they would get credit for anything I posted and they said that was not necessary.
“Instead,” said Mr. McShroud, “just say…’It Came From Hollywood.’” (ZC Note: Yup. You will never forget It Came From Hollywood.)
I agreed, as that was, indeed, a fitting name. I thanked the gentlemen over and over and they smiled in an assuring way. They slowly made their way down my sidewalk, onto the path, and disappeared into the distance.
I spent the next three hours going over the contents of the box, shaking my head at the numerous treasures my hands uncovered: priceless audio unheard for years; things most people never knew existed. And from all movie genres, too.
I sighed deeply. I had an awesome responsibility ahead of me. I had to preserve the collection of these two gentlemen, fans of a passing time in the movie industry: a time when the mind’s eye filled in the images conjured up by these audio gems heard on the radio or in theater lobbies. I was overwhelmed by what I held in my hands. It was too much for one person to handle.
I called up my old friend, Zoc at Zombos’ Closet (ZC Note: yup, that’s me), and aroused him from a drunken stupor (ZC Note: Never touch the stuff, but I do sip it now and then). After I had explained what had happened, he agreed to help me preserve these priceless treasures by taking everything but the old horror, sci-fi, beach party and sword-and-sandal spots and airing all the others through his It Came From Hollywood banner. I was relieved.
And so, dear listener, if you are a horror or movie collector at all, you probably know the joy I felt being entrusted with these rare items for the movies we love and hold dear. Now, over the months to come, I get to share them with you as Mr. McShroud and Mr. O’Graves shared them with me. I hope you will treasure them and enjoy listening to them as much as I do.
ZC Note: By special request of Paul McShroud (aka Paul McVay of, you guessed it, It Came From Hollywood), I took the liberty of putting The Student Nurses, The Young Nurses, the Swinging Barmaids, in this post along with the Beach Party and Beach Blanket Bingo spots to ogle your ears. Paul’s intros for the nurses and barmaids spots are included. From Paul: “If you are unfamiliar with the open-ended interview concept, here is how it works. This record went out with a four-page script with questions your local DJ could ask while playing the recorded response via the record. Thus, simulating an actual “on-air” interview with “real” Hollywood stars! I’ve since lost (or misplaced) the script that came with this record, but it is still quite fun to listen to the actor’s responses. I’ve reduced the dead space between responses, where the local DJ would have asked the questions to move the cuts along.”
*So there you go. Don’t tell Granny…it will be our little secret. She wanted to post boring spots for Forbidden World, Congueror Worm, Blast Off, and Deranged. We’ll squeeze them into Granny’s next post…sorry.
Beach Blanket Bingo – Open End Interview with Frankie Avalon
Beach Blanket Bingo – Open End Interview with Deborah Walley
Beach Blanket Bingo – Open End Interview with Paul Lynde
Beach Blanket Bingo – Open End Interview with Jody Macrea
Beach Party Theater Lobby Spots – DJ James Holt hosts a beach party right here in the lobby, featuring Frankie Avalon’s “Beach Party Tonight” song from the film and beach sound effects in the background! There is a 3-minute and a 2-minute 30-second cut, and both are outstanding fun.
The Student Nurses – Two spots, 60 and 30 seconds each. Before one can be a young nurse, one needs to be a student nurse. See what I did there? More Summer fun with nurses on the run. It has nothing to do with Summer, but we can file these ads under “Educational.” You know, because they’re students!
The Young Nurses – Three spots (15 Sec, 30 Sec, and 60 Sec)—What would Summer be without some young nurses hanging around? Okay, that was a reach there, but no excuse is really needed to enjoy these young nurses’ radio ads. It’s medicinal, as they say!
The Swinging Barmaids – Two Spots, 60 and 30 seconds each. While you’re a student nurse, you might want to hold down a job to help pay for schooling. Enter The Swinging Barmaids! Ready to serve up some frosty beverages on a hot Summer’s day. Man, I’m really trying to tie all these together, aren’t I? It’s all good Rated R fun!