While the 4,000 dollar price tag kept me from purchasing the pair of unique bronze bat sconces, I drooled with envy and imagined they had come from Castle Dracula. I saw them on the wall of a shop while antiquing in Hudson, New York, this past weekend. Here’s a closeup of one of them.
The marketing hype on this gruesome trick is zany fun: freak out your neighbors! Put it under a sibling's bed!
For a little rubber hand two inches in size (before growing), its visually striking display on this red, black, and white card package makes it irresistible. As well as the little bit of bone sticking out the end, which contrasts nicely against the red stump. How can you pass it up?
For an added treat, the disclaimer on the back is charmingly nonsensical: This toy is in no way intended to represent living people. Any resemblance is purely coincidental and not intended to harm anyone.
I suppose if you know someone who's all thumbs, they may be a little offended.
I find the 50% Off Card Stores a veritable treasure trove for older Halloween cutout decorations. With the party stores fading away (and their supply of Beistle cutouts with them), I now scour these card stores every October, along with mom and pop drug stores, for interesting pieces to add to my collection.
I found this charming little vampire in a store I always seem to have luck with. He’s approximately 8 inches tall and 7 inches wide. His eyes light up and he makes suitably irritating Halloween sounds. The colors are superb and he looks sinister in that not-so-scary way which is half-way between too cute and too serious. He’s also motion activated to delight trick or treaters.
The box he comes in is another matter. Pink? The graphic design is also not very eye-catching for the true Halloween aficionado. My assumption is Russ had their birthday party designers do this one. I would have designed a coffin box with a cellophane window showing his handsome, toothy grin.
I love Halloween items that glow. This pin is about an inch and a half high.
I picked this happy duo up at a CVS (or maybe it was Walgreens) a few years ago. Would I do it again? No. Not that they aren’t well crafted, it’s just I really don’t like Halloween items that are too cutesy. I’m not much into plastic gore pieces, either, but ol’ green eyes looks more like a hobo than The Monster. The skeleton is kind of Dia de los Muertos, though, so not too badly done.
Okay, so it doesn’t make much sense for Dracula to need a dagger; but it beats a glowing stake, right? The mask isn’t much of one, either: it’s about the size of a fifty-cent piece. You can wear it over one eye for an eye-mask, I suppose. Jolly Roger Pumpkin Pirate or something catchy like that would maybe work.
It’s still cool. Look at that handsome, luridly green Count Dracula menacing us with his glowing dagger as he flashes those pearly chompers.
You won’t see Halloween toys like this anymore. Kids might trip and fall onto the nasty-looking point of this wicked plastic weapon of doom and go crying to their lawyer. Or maybe pop some other kid’s eye out with it.
Then again, maybe that’s why they included the eye-mask? Shrewd.
Target has begun to stock Halloween gruesomeness onto their store shelves. I fell in love with this Laboratory Shocker Door Knocker immediately. It's shockingly detailed–nice touch with the dangling electrical wires–and fun to use. Just press down on the handle and it lights up.
Oh, and blood-curdling screams will be heard in-between jolts of zizzing electricity, adding to the merriment. A must for haunted attraction fans.
You can find it online at the Target.com website as well as the store. Click the image to see it close up. Just don't drool.
“Not another new horror magazine?” asked Zombos.
I nodded. “Yes, they seem to be popping up as fast as flies on a corpse these days.”
“Any good?”
Before I could reply, I heard Zombos junior calling for his dad. Zombos panicked. “Lord no! If I have to watch High School Musical one more time I’ll pluck my eyes out! Don’t tell him you saw me!” Zombos jumped behind the sofa to hide.
“Have you seen Daddoes?” asked junior, as he ran into the room.
“Why no. I don’t know where he is,” I said, while motioning to junior to look behind me.
“Dadda!” he cried, jumping onto the sofa beside me and looking behind it. He is such a bright boy. “Come on! Mommy said you would watch High School Musical with me while she went shopping.”
A cry of anguish escaped Zombos’ lips as he was reluctantly pulled out of the room. I could hear him moaning all the way down the hall. Poor fellow. At least things were getting back to normal at the mansion.
I returned to reading my new horror magazine. When that was done, I flipped on the old PC for something completely different, and started watching the Something To Be Desired: Halloween Special (on Blip.tv).
STBD has been on the Internet air for four years now. Created, directed and produced by Justin Kownacki, who is also a rodeo clown and lawn-flamingo assembly worker (hey, it’s Pittsburgh, what else are you going to do?), the comedy series follows the trials and tribulations of DJs at the WANT FM radio station.
The Halloween Special is a fast-paced, wacky zombie-fest complete with gore and well done makeup, that places our intrepid DJs in a dire situation as they try to not get eaten by the horde of dead party-goers that suddenly show up at the station. It also answers the burning question, “what does a vegetarian zombie eat?”
It took STBD four years to finally do this Simpsons’ Tree House of Horror-styled episode, so I asked Justin and Erik Schark (he plays Rich Mathis on the show) a few questions about the special and STBD.
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Interview: Something To Be Desired
Halloween SpecialRead More »