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Halloween Candy

Halloween Stretchable Horror Monsters
Dracula, Wolf Man, Frankie

I picked up these scary jigglers  at Toys "R" Us during Halloween a few years ago. They are about 5 inches high and smell like strechable rubber monsters normally do, which is badly. But they were too adorable to pass up, especially with their expressive faces and shiny colors. Frankenstein's Monster is my favorite. His tux beats even Dracula's and that bolt through his head is hilarious. No wonder his eyes are popping.

halloween stretchable horror monsters
halloween stretchable horror monsters

Halloween Splats
Frankenstein Monster’s Head

halloween splat frankenstein monster There’s something organically satisfying about throwing things against a wall, especially when they explode, shatter, or splat. Bouncing means too much work because you’ve got to catch the blasted thing on the rebound, so that’s not much fun.

But squishing and splatting does it best for me. With this nifty little pocket toy you can launch the Monster’s head–the splattee–with the cool skeleton arm–the splatterer. Notice on the bottom right of the card the words “Includes Splat and Launcher.” That’s important because without the skeleton arm to send your splat to the wall, it’s just not as much fun.

I just wished they didn’t make the little guy so cheerful-looking. Makes me feel guilty I’m about to squish him against a smooth, flat surface, face first. Better that he had a mean-looking or scary face, you know, like they do it in horror movies by making the victim sort of deserve what’s coming, even though it’s nasty as hell.

Now, I’m not sure how you’d carry this gem around with you: if you put the little head in your jeans pocket, well, I’d say you will wind up with an embarrassing situation to say the least.

 

Halloween Whistle Toppers

halloween whistle toppers There’s this wonderfully spooky short story written by Montague Rhodes James called “Oh, Whistle, and I’ll Come To You, My Lad.” A solitary walk along the shore leads to the discovery of a whistle. That whistle calls something forth that were better left unsummoned. I think of his story every time I see Halloween candy whistles like the likable witch and skull-headed ghost here.

After all the candy is gone, you can either play with them, they’re finger puppets, or blow the whistle to summon forth your own nasty trickster; although today it would probably be an annoyed adult tired of all that noise telling you to quit or else.

The skeleton and Frankenstein Monster candy containers at the ends aren’t finger puppets, but still fun to play with. The skeleton has a suction cup on the bottom, and the skull is on a spring. You can wobble him but good as the mood strikes you. The purple Monster has such a ghoulishly giddy grin, you wonder why he’s so happy. Maybe it’s because he’s sitting on top of all that colorful, sweet candy, waiting to be picked up by his outstretched arms. Just for you.

 

Halloween Self-Adhesive Frankenstein Accessory
Scar and Neck Bolts

Halloween Self-Adhesive Frankenstein Accessory Scar and Neck Bolts Being a mad scientist is always daunting. What with digging up cadavers, piecing them together in the dead of night, and having your fiancee always dragging in some old teacher or such to interfere with your work–not to mention those numb-skull assistants the Goldstadt employment agency keeps sending you–you can never seem to get your work done.

Never fear; Steptoes of England steps in to lighten your burden with their Self Adhesive Frankenstein Accessory. Even Wolf Von Frankenstein would appreciate the workmanship. And look at that wonderful black and yellow image of Boris Karloff’s creation happily demonstrating the effectiveness of this wonderful suturing appliance with the all-essential neck bolt hardware.

You’ll have a Happy Halloween with this one for sure.

 

 

Halloween Flashing Button
Frankenstein Monster

Halloween Flashing Button Frankenstein Monster This Frankenstein Monster's flashing button caught my eye while I roamed an old party goods store in New Jersey, some years back, for Halloween goodies. It was made in China for The Diploma Mill of Denver Colorado (which could explain the lack of the word Frankenstein anywhere on the package as it appears to be unlicensed merchandise).

The Boris Karloff image of the Monster is what made me drool. The eyes light up and it makes that annoyingly familiar Halloween sound that could irritate you enough to commit bodily harm to the person wearing this stylish button.

 

 

Halloween Trick or Treater
Vintage Photograph

Halloween Trick or Treater Vintage Photograph Paul Bibeau (author of the excellent Sundays with Vlad), and his Goblin Books blog, noted these old Halloween photographs, collected on Flickr by stevechasmar.

Paul says "Titled 'Halloween in the Time of Cholera' the collection is funny, bizarre, and often deeply disturbing." I agree. It is also evocative: a shadow show of silver nitrate ghosts, flickering and merging across our own memories of Halloween.

Halloween M’EYE’Graine Safety Light

halloween Meyegrain Safety Light I'm a sucker for monsterish Halloween swag that keeps the ghoulishly fun aspect of the season in proper perspective. Here's one little gem I found, to my pleasant surprise, in a grocery store last week. The backing card is quite an eyeful; colorful and creepy and nicely displays the product in context.

What self-respecting little Halloween trickster wouldn't want to wear this cool safety light proudly around their necks as they stomp the sidewalks for sweets and treats?

Pumpkin Carvings to Die For

I dread carving up the jack-o-lantern every Halloween. After spending so much money for the biggest, baddest, pumpkin in the lot, my feeble carving skills wind up leaving my orange ball of stringy guts with a rinky-dink face comprised of an uneven smile, oddball eyes, and slanted teeth that convey no horror bite, nor whimsy, nor anything remotely appropriate for Halloween.

So when I see pumpkin carving skill as displayed at http://www.extremepumpkins.com, I envy, I covet, I stand, drooling from my trembling lips, in awe.

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