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JM Cozzoli

A horror genre fan with a blog. Scary.

Don’t Look Away (2023)
Review

/ Movies (Horror) / Leave a Comment

DontLookAway_KeyArt_06_2000x3000Zombos Says: By all means, see it!

I was robbed! Here I'm thinking, with a title like Don't Look Away, and let's face it, a crazy premise, I had all the snarky review taglines ready: like You Must Look Away! or No, Really, Don't Look! And then they throw a curveball and make an entertaining romp with a devilish mannequin that just stands there like, um, a mannequin. And it works.

I can imagine the pitch party with this one.

"Hey, you know those Weeping Angels in Doctor Who? Cool right? What if we take 'em and add a little Zuni Fetish Doll Warrior-lethal craziness from Trilogy of Terror (1975), toss in some cockamamie curse angle like they do in those J-Horror movies where you don't have to explain the backstory coherently, and punch it up to a mannequin-sized monster that goes after people that see it?"

"Sounds great! But…"

"What buts?"

"Big buts. But the CGI blows our budget out of the water, and, really, how goofy would that look on screen watching a mannequin butcher people? I mean, but how does he move or hold onto things or rip out their throats and do slasher stuff like that? Practical effects would suck, period"

"Oh, that. Thinking, thinking…I know! He doesn't move! We just move him around a lot, do some quick edits, and bam! A quantum singularity mannequin! He appears, cut to people mauled five ways to Sunday, he disappears."

"That's the stupidest thing I've heard and yet, brilliant! Let's go sell this baby!"

And here we are. 

Don't Look Away Mannequin

Frankie (Kelley Bastard) winds up hitting a truck driver running from a heist gone bad. Seems the sole cargo on the truck was a big box of whoop ass courtesy of a mannequin after the lid is taken off. Eventually Frankie tries to describe what she saw at the crime scene when she's asked if she saw anything, but one of the cops, after the two of them look at each other, asks "like a Bloomingdale's mannequin?" But Kelley has seen the mannequin-stein and that kicks off the cat and mouse game of survival; mostly for her friends though, because she points out the mannequin to them when it hangs (well, stands actually) around her house.

Her friends are also hard to get buy-in on They just head to a nightclub to cheer her up. Bad idea. Of course, Jonah (Michael Mitton), the guy who wants to be her boyfriend, starts to realize she isn't crazy, but her live-in guy, Steve (Colm Hill), who's kind of loopy to begin with, thinks she's imagining things. He has a The Shining moment later on, though, as the mannequin proves it just doesn't stand around. All of which is foreshadowed by a television glimpse of The Shining as the Scooby-Don't team debates Frankie' delusion. 

Of course, the one black guy, Drake (Abu Dukuly), suddenly pulls a gun from his drawer to give to his girlfriend, Lucy (Rene Lai). One of these days we'll actually see the one white guy pull a gun from his drawer and give it to his significant other too. But for now, even with a bat in hand, Drake isn't as tough as he looks. None of them are. Even trying to burn it has dire consequences.

Cue the viral video online that alerts them to others who have experienced the mannequin's evil. Reaching out, they learn a few things to save themselves. They also discover Malick (Michael Bafaro), who was the one having the thing shipped to his estate. He certainly doesn't look the type to have an estate, but let that one slide. This is where the J-Horror aspect comes in because Malick tells them they are all cursed but turns out to be less informative than they hope (hell, I think they already knew that), and prone to mischief himself. 

This is a franchise-building entry that provides chills through a simple premise with great bang for the buck ratio: an indestructible monster that has to be the cheapest practical effect ever devised, and a story that is crying out for a backstory as to how this evil, demonic thing, came to life. Don't Look Now makes you feel a bit 1980s, and that's a good thing. And I dare them to show me Malick's estate in the sequel. Or explain how this thing can stay locked in a box when it can appear and disappear all over the place in microseconds. I will take whichever comes first.

Dont Look Away Characters Scene

Frankenstein 1970 (1958)
Theater Herald

/ Pressbooks (Horror, Sci Fi, Fantasy) / Leave a Comment

Here's the large format theater herald to hawk Frankenstein 1970. Baron Frankenstein, desperate for money to complete his experiments, allows a film crew to follow him for a documentary. Running out of spare parts, he puts the arm on the film crew, so to speak. In this iteration of monster creation, Frankenstein uses an atomic reactor to power the creature. The story is good and with a bit more pizazz, money, and color, this could have been more of a Hammerlike endeavor.

Frankenstein 1970 Theater Herald 01

Frankenstein 1970 Theater Herald 03

Frankenstein 1970 Theater Herald 02

 

Psycho (1960) Radio Spots

/ Granny Creech's Radio Spot Crypt / Leave a Comment

Hitchcock Line ArtHow do you do. This is the ghost of Alfred Hitchcock and I am delighted to be here at Granny Creech’s Radio Spot Crypt. It seems that our dear old Granny has decided to feature the radio spots for my movie Psycho, a feat of which must have been a serious undertaking for her.  

Actually, there are two sets of spots that will be presented here. The first set is for the original release of Psycho in 1960; the second set is for its re-release in 1969. Those will be featured next week. I think you will find both sets equally charming.

For whatever reason, Granny Creech gets a kick out of my vocal delivery, calling it droll and dry, and somewhat humorous.  I can assure you these spots were delivered in all seriousness with the goal of attracting as many patrons to the theatre as possible.

And so, I will leave it up to you, the discerning listener, to determine the effectiveness of the spots.  I trust they will leave you with the most pleasant memories and the most chilling nightmares. Thank you.”

Listen to Psycho (10 seconds)

Listen to Psycho (20 seconds)

Listen to Psycho (30 seconds)a

Listen to Psycho (30 seconds)b

Listen to Psycho (30 seconds)c

Listen to Psycho (30 seconds)d

Listen to Psycho (60 seconds)a

Listen to Psycho (60 seconds)b

Listen to Psycho (60 seconds)c

Listen to Psycho (60 seconds)d

Psycho Alfred Hitchcock Standee

Alfred Hitchcock Psycho Theater Standee
Alfred Hitchcock holding Psycho Clapper

Alfred Hitchcock on Psycho movie set

Percepto and The Tingler
Motion Picture Herald 1959

/ Professor Kinema Archives / Leave a Comment

Fresh from one (of many) of Professor Kinema's rusty old standup file cabinets comes this Motion Picture Herald promo article for Percepto and The Tingler (1959). The Professor also sends along this snapshot, taken during a trip to Forrest J. Ackerman's abode. In it you can see most of the original Tingler prop, along with a few other items you may be well familiar with. One misconception about Percepto is that it delivered electrical shocks to patrons at a key scene during the movie. Ah contraire, my fellow deadites. Not even William Castle was that crazy. Percepto used a buzzing vibration to scare the audience. One problem was that kids got wise and started trying to add the device to their pirate treasure, so I'm sure many theater owners had their hands full keeping the little monsters at bay.

The Tingler Motion Picture Herald 01

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Percepto and The Tingler
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William Castle’s Movies Through Audio Thrills

/ Granny Creech's Radio Spot Crypt / Leave a Comment
William Castle Smoking Cigar and Seated In Director's Chair

William Castle Seated In Director's Chair

Your old Granny Creech has been thinking a lot lately about William Castle, Mr. Showmanship himself.

 
I loved all his movies and gimmicks, and his desire to give his audiences more bang for their buck. I’ve included some of his spots here for your listening enjoyment.  Just imagine hearing these on your AM radio! I couldn’t wait to see the movie!
First up are three spots for his movie Macabre, the film which featured great poster and advertising art. When you entered the theater you were given a $1000 insurance policy on which you could list your beneficiaries should you die of fright while watching Macabre.
 
See the nurse in the lobby? She was there with smelling salts if you needed them. And after seeing that horror doll in the casket, I felt like I needed them! That face gave me nightmares forever!
 
 

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That’s a Wrap (2023)
Needs More Paper and Tape

/ Movies (Bad) / Leave a Comment

THAT_S A WRAP - PosterZombos Says: Poppycock!

Paul Holstenwall, our neighbor and purveyor extraordinaire of bad movies, had brought along That's a Wrap, which launched at FrightFest recently, to show Zombos and me. It had been a while since we were seated comfortably in the cinematorium to watch horror movies, and well, what the hell, I took a chance. Even knowing that Paul, who long-time readers of Zombos' Closet will recall has questionable taste (see one of Paul's misfires here), rarely brings the good stuff.

It had been a long while since I last reviewed a less than stellar endeavor and with IMDb giving this one a 6.7 rating, I felt somewhat safe. I wasn't. I also now know that IMDb ratings don't rate for much. I guess having an extended family, when you're in the business, can be a big help after all. 

"So," asked Paul, "what did you think?" I looked at him. I looked at Zombos. Both stared at me, one beaming with delight, the other just beaming. Like death ray beaming to be precise. I lifted my Lychee French 75 that Chef Machiavelli had heavy-handed with the gin and gulped it down. I confess I held his hand while he poured the gin. I should have held it longer.

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That’s a Wrap (2023)
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Michaels Halloween 2023 Sighted

/ Halloween Novelty / 1 Comment

Michaels has become my bellwether for Halloween. They have so much variety in their offerings, you can't go wrong. There's the gothic decor, blow molds, creepy spooky smalls, skeletons galore, Lemax Spooky Town, oh my! And they bring it all out in August! Just when us diehards are giving our last gasp from the heat and sandy beach terrors of the summer, it all comes in the nick of time. Here are some highlights.

Michaels 2023 Halloween 03

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Mr. Sardonicus (1961) Pressbook

/ Pressbooks (Horror, Sci Fi, Fantasy) / 1 Comment

From Professor Kinema's archives comes this ominous copy of the Mr. Sardonicus pressbook. Lots of promotional material here, all laid out on one large sheet of glossy paper that folds to a nice petite mailing size for sending to theaters. The Punishment Poll was another gimmick William Castle used to get those butts in seats. We know there weren't two different endings shot for this movie, right? Mr. Sardonicus wasn't going to get off that easy now was he? Thanks to the Professor, here are some scene stills to entice you even more to see this one.

Comic Reader version: Download Mr Sardonicus

MrSardonicus 01

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The Weird Kidz (2023)

/ Art/Animation / 2 Comments

WKZ_004

Zombos Says: Crude, Rude, and Good

Watching The Weird Kidz, an animated horror tale from Zach Passero (writer, director, animator) and Hannah Passero (background artist), you get a vibe like this film is fresh out of a VHS cassette cover that was gotten from a mom and pop video store, from that section in back of the store, separated by a beaded curtain, making those videos mysterious, potentially naughty, and usually in need of a little extra kick (just saying) to enjoy with friends; you know, where only the true die hards would venture in search of a change-up from the usual mainstream glossy stuff. So yes, crude, rude, and definitely with hints of 70s and 80s growing up pains, The Weird Kidz can grow on you. It is like watching an X-Files episode done in a Robert Crumb underground comics kind of way, if Crumb was plastered to the walls and did not know what day it was.

The Weird Kidz in cave
It definitely looks like it took 8 years for Passero to draw it, which is not to say that is a bad thing. The lines, the motion, and backgrounds (thanks to his wife) are basic and a bit short of  the word "style," but paired with the story it all works. And given the personalities of his characters, the simple art meshes well with them.

Their dialog delivery and relationship chemistry is much like what you would find in King of the Hill or Beavis and Butt-head. Not the smartest bunch, just simple but earnest and working through the awkward growing-up bits of life.

The most awkward of the bunch is Dug ( Tess Passero), being overweight, not athletic, and pretty good at arcade games. Flashbacks give us his rough connections with meeting everybody else's expectations, but he turns out to be determined in his actions and even-tempered when the monster shows up with It's family. Mel (Glenn Bolton) and Fatt (Brian Ceely) are his closest friends. Fatt isn't, and Mel, like Wyatt (Ellar Coltrane), has more adult stuff on his mind.

That more adult stuff comes into focus when Mary (Sydney O-Donnell) joins the group for a camping trip to Jerusalem Park. Of course, the local legend of the Night Child cryptid munching on people just adds to the campfire spook story effect; until Dug goes missing, Wyatt and Mary almost do it and suffer cryptid-interruptus, and Mel and Fatt get an eyeful of adult stuff with lots of fireworks.

Cue the cryptid  and an unwelcomed spelunking, and the horror takes off from there. More terrifying are the sheriff (Sean Bridgers) and the only-store-for-miles lady (Angela Bettis), once they get involved. That's because they were already involved. Sneaky bastards.

WKZ_008

As the voices go, they work well, but Mary's a bit too copacetic sounding at the worst times, and I would have expected Grumbles the bloodhound to have a lower voice given the balls he carries around (Passero is definitely not a Disney animator). It is also a bit funny watching anyone walk as the motion is abbreviated, but the overall direction keeps the story moving even if the characters are not. Also, either Wyatt is more stoned than he appears or he can take it on the chin much more than one would expect, given he gives one for the cryptid team. And Dug goes one better too, given the circumstances. 

The Weird Kidz is a throwback to the life is hard, then you run from monsters making it even harder period of the 1970s and the growing-pains-suck-but-figure-it-out period of the 1980s. Taking us back to that section of the video store is always iffy at best, but this time around, it is a worthwhile trip.

What is a Radio Spot?

/ Granny Creech's Radio Spot Crypt / Leave a Comment

GrannyCreechPortraitThis article was sent by bmail (that's batmail) from Granny Creech. A note that said Read it or Else was attached to it by a rusty paper clip. So…

What is a radio spot?

Well, back in the day when Granny Creech was just a young little thing, movie studios used to offer to movie theaters a vinyl record containing advertisements for the movie they were exhibiting. They first were issued on 10” 78 rpm records, then later 12” 33 1/3 rpm records or 7” 45 rpm records. The advertisements, or “spots”, usually varied in length, from 10 seconds up to one minute, leaving time at the end for a local announcer to “tag” the spot: “Now showing at the Rialto Theater.” Some records contained multiples of each time length.

When the theater manager received the record, they contacted their sales representative at the local radio station. The rep then designed a “package” of airplay. For example, they might sell the theater a package of 50 time slots over the course of a few days or a week for “x” amount of dollars.  The spots would be played throughout the days, in between songs and other commercials, on a predetermined schedule, with emphasis placed on “drive time” (when motorists were in their car going to and from work), and weekends.  The number of spots played per day usually increased as the start date of the movie drew near.

Spots produced for the movie varied greatly in terms of production value and complexity.  Often, as was the case in the city where your Granny grew up, the local radio station produced original spots based on info provided by the theater manager.  In some instances, the locally-produced spots were better than the studio-issued spots. Locally produced spots were the norm for drive-ins that showed three or more features per night.

Sadly, most spot records were discarded after the movie left the area. There was no longer any need for them.  Some were saved by disc jockeys or theater personnel, but for the most part, that unique segment of movie promotion history was lost forever. However, some Monsterkids had the foresight to use their reel-to-reel tape recorders to record the spots live off the air.

The spots presented here in Granny Creech’s Radio Spot Crypt are some of my favorites. Some are better than others, but they all take me back to a simpler time, a time when listening to your favorite Top 40 radio station allowed you to hear of an exciting movie coming to your favorite theater. I’ve collected them from many places over many years.  The names of the sites and the contributors have long-since been forgotten, but my thanks go out to those who shared my interest in them and preserved them for us to enjoy today.

Listen…

Jack Armstrong (1947) Pressbook

/ Pressbooks (Horror, Sci Fi, Fantasy) / Leave a Comment

Jack Armstrong, The All-American Boy, had been on the radio for 14 years by the time Sam Katzman brought him to the screen in this 15 chapter serial. Once again, an evil mastermind is determined to use his death ray on the innocent. If nothing else, the serials taught us that it takes just one person to make a lot of trouble for the rest of us. And that death rays were cool weapons as long as you were not in the line of fire. Oh, and pretty easy to make, apparently. This pressbook has one of my favorite promotional gimmicks: the coloring page! One important note, too: Jack Armstrong may be rather silly, now that times have changed, but the character promoted a healthy wonder for science and cultures as part of being a well-rounded individual. An animated pilot for Jack Armstrong was done by Hanna-Barbera, but due to rights issues, that project eventually turned into Johnny Quest. (Check out the Johnny Quest FAQ at http://www.classicjq.com/info/JQFAQ.aspx.)

Download the comic reader version: Download Jack Armstrong The All American Boy

Jack Armstrong The All American Boy 01

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